Ready to Start Over

(first published in Ukiah Daily Journal September 20, 2015)

Getting ready to head out for a walk in the very welcome rain, I recalled the bright yellow rain jacket I used to have. Then I reflected that it had been in one of those huge bags full of clothes that were donated to local charities as I made a recent move. Just too much stuff, you know.

This has happened before. There have been too many moves to recall, it seems. Sometimes I will pause and remember a beautiful piece of furniture that wouldn’t fit into a new residence and had to be given away – to whom I am not always sure, but it does not grace my living spaces anymore.

Those are just things, I’ve told myself. Not important, really! Don’t get me started on the people I no longer can see or talk to…that’s way too sad to remember. Yet life continues – for me.

Many folks may feel that way today who have been burnt out and evacuated from their homes in nearby counties; and they will be missing lots of things: their child’s favorite toy, that box of travel souvenirs, or the ring from that special someone in the past. Not easy to replace.

Thankfully, the death toll has not been high; one retired teacher who gave many students some memories in years past, no doubt. We read or hear about Barbara McWilliams’ tragic death and feel terrible. Sadly, breaking news continues to report that several more are missing and may possibly have lost their lives as well in the disaster. Those who survive feel lucky, but also mourn those who were not so lucky. What a dichotomy of feeling.

Watching news and YouTube videos gives us a close look at the reality of many affected by the nearby Valley fire. Several who discover their homes are still standing have expressed relief, followed by guilt. They ask, “Why me, but not my neighbor?”

Fire officials cannot answer that either; fire swept in so fast, and somehow skipped over a few buildings. Guesses range from wind changes to building materials, but that strangeness still exists with which all have to live.

Like many, I’ve tried to imagine what I would run to safety with if I only had a few minutes; it’s not a pretty picture. My imagination cannot begin to encompass what I would really feel and do, I’m sure. Yet many of us must try. Empathy insists we do this.

The big question now must be how do they start over? Those interviewed are just coming out of shock enough to start wondering about their insurance coverage or where they will be allowed to live for the near future.

For some, it may be years before they are able to go back to their old living space – if they even want to or can do that. Red tape will be stretching for miles in some cases. A few who have been interviewed mentioned that they weren’t allowed to maintain much of a policy on their homes because it was in a rural, wooded area. Thanks, big insurance companies who can afford to say no.

Renters, business owners and homeowners alike will be dependent on local emergency funds and Red Cross donations for quite awhile. Then what? How do you rebuild a whole town? Not many have had to do that in recent years; San Francisco’s comeback from earthquake and ash was huge, but not many are still alive to share with us their stories of starting over. Just imagine how different build permits and insurance procedures might have been over a hundred years ago though.

Today we see huge donations coming in from large corporations and organizations which is wonderful, but how does all of that get divvied up and put to rebuilding little Jane Doe’s house in Middletown, I don’t know. Come to think of it, I even heard recently a few sad stories of folks whose lives have not been put right from the Hurricane Katrina devastation ten years ago.

Taking inventory with a calm mind would be necessary to really get a handle on rebuilding. Perhaps using a third party who has no investment in your decisions would help, too. Which new resources are at your disposal – and how do you access them would be a next step.

Then, I imagine a myriad of scenarios would dictate your next step towards re-settling of you and your family. Each person, family and business is very unique so there would be no blanketed advice to give everyone. All would have their own maze in which to maneuver back to a sense of well-being again.

It’s probably very good advice for all of us to set up a plan for emergency or disaster – at least as much as we can. And, hopefully, there would be avenues of help for us, if needed, thanks to generous donations from our fellow humans. That’s the magic word in this case – hope. Do not lose it, and do not hesitate to give it to those who need it now! 

Brews 'N' Blues

(Published in the Ukiah Daily Journal - - August 23, 2015)

Driving past the sad, tall-sailing “Fjord” sign, I flashed yet again on how wonderful it would be if somebody opened a business in that very optimal site. And, unlike the very cool Bagel Zen Blues which had a very short shelf life, hopefully it would be supported locally and offer culinary and musical treats to this little town.

If not for the wonderful free summer concerts, Ukiah’s live music venues would be fewer and farther between. The Office is still going strong a couple of concerts per month, but seating is very limited and late hours aren’t possible due to the residential neighborhood.

Ukiah’s own Brewing Company has morphed into the more prestigious Ritual…an interesting but actually a possibly disturbing name to some for a restaurant. Prices are higher, but servings are tiny on large plates. The worst part? The stage was traded for two or three more tables, so NO more live music!

Some of us thought years ago that we’d see more lively evenings when Mendocino Brewing Company changed from its Hopland hot night venue and set up production at the south industrial area in Ukiah. But, no. Their nearby store is pretty much that – a store for their beers with no atmosphere and offer only theater-style hot dogs and maybe fries if you’re lucky. At least that was my experience in the past. I hope it’s changed.

The huge Crush steakhouse has talented pianists playing in the entry (a little hard to hear back in the booths and tables) but disappointingly stopped their live weekend music in the large, casual bar section on weekends.

We can find chicken wings and trucker breakfasts along with some take-home pizza and sandwiches on the north end of town, but have to drive up to Redwood Valley for truly good cuisine – to Mario’s Italian Restaurant or The Broiler, which has its awesome retro bar, but have yet to hear any live music there.

Thankfully, a new version of the previous Redwood Valley Café is opening soon and plans more live music. They have a lot to offer in the way of stage space and had a reputation for good service, too. But, it’s a drive – on the highway, late at night after good tunes and imbibing, which can cause concern.

For that casual patron of drink and loud bands, Club Calpella offers party-central, especially for holiday celebrations! That’s lucky for local bands like Double Standyrd, Warehouse 21, Fat Chance Trucking Band and more.

Thank goodness for some wineries in our area who know the importance of bringing out patrons by offering more than wine; adding musicians and caterers draws more customers, they’ve learned. Nelson Family Vineyards, Parducci, Rivino and Simaine Cellars have discovered this secret. Testa Vineyards now, too, I hear.

However, back in the little town of Ukiah…

Downtown restaurants like Dora’s Gourmet Café, Oco Time, Patrona’s and Saucy are jammed and treat customers to great food at reasonable prices, but none offer dinner with live music; though I’m sure if adequate space were available, these owners would appreciate the opportunity for local – and out of area musicians to complete an occasional stellar evening for us. Anna’s Bistro has an early evening of live music sporadically, to complement their wonderful menu and premium wines.

Perhaps I’m just a bit deflated after attending the 9^th annual Blue Wing Blues Festival in Upper Lake. Yes, it’s a half hour away, but certainly worth the drive to hear fantastic blues artists while enjoying local wines and fairly tasty food under the lights and sycamores.

There is still one more night Bernie Butcher, the owner, has scheduled coming up on Labor Day. Check it out and get your tickets at bluewingsaloon.com or call 275-2233. Monday, September 7 promises to be terrific music with boogie woogie queen, Wendy Dewitt (a top act of her own) opening for Nancy Wright, an amazing saxophonist from the Bay Area who is an up and coming player on regional and international blues scenes. She lit up the stages on a Legendary Rhythm and Blues Cruise we had the pleasure to be on recently.

A letter published in the Ukiah Daily Journal some days ago voiced concern over the rumor about a new tavern possibly opening where Dragon’s Lair store and Romi’s Brew and BBQ are now located on Perkins Street. Well, it would be welcomed with open arms. Nearby Perkins Street Lounge’s dancing poles and pool tables have their place; but a classy, noisy bar with occasional live music would be a welcome addition for many Ukiahans.

There’s so much good food and live music in the world to be enjoyed. I hope more of it comes to our little town.

Every Day's a Saturday

(originally published in the Ukiah Daily Journal June 28, 2015)

As much as most of us do not enjoy the slowing of our bodies or the graying of our hair, we have to admit that the growing wisdom from experience and the dawning of retirement upon our lives can definitely help to compensate for some of the physical downgrade.

Of course, the biological struggle continues for many when Rogaine, Botox and Viagra use become part of the senior citizens’ efforts to ward off the inevitable; aging gracefully is much easier to talk about when we’re 40 than it is twenty or thirty more years down the road.

It is a time of letting go: the tedious grind, the daily job, the busy hubbub. Somewhat bittersweet for most, but still a release. Maybe it’s a practice, or a drill, if you will – for when we pass from this life altogether? We’ll see.

I do know for a fact that retiring from one’s chosen career or profession sometimes leads to a whole new opportunity of work. This hasn’t happened to me – yet. I am still very happy to sleep in whenever I desire and not have to please my superiors. That has been an immense joy, and I will not let it go easily.

However, both my parents began employment in a completely different field after their retirements in their late 60’s. For more than a decade they were very satisfied to get up and go to work, again. It was inspiring in many ways to watch them stay useful and benefit from extra pay. People they worked with also enjoyed the advantage of my parents’ wisdom and experience, making it a win-win.

Perhaps that is one reason why they are still up and going now (Mom’s 87, Dad’s 93). Another reason, I believe, is because they still have each other; not many are that fortunate. Maintaining a bond with a mate can definitely extend one’s time here on earth; statistics are there if you look.

One man I had the privilege to know met his new love after he listened to friends who encouraged him to go out to musical events when he was nearing 70. Reticent to enter the dating world, he still opened his life to someone once more. His willingness to love again is an inspiration to all the aging friends he left behind when he passed.

Other close friends retiring from their careers before me, and now after me, are finding the boundless joys this exciting and mysterious time in life can bring. Offset by parents passing or the need to replace knees and shoulders, this life of ‘every day’s a Saturday’ is definitely worth the years of work that brought it to pass.

It is often annoying, though, to see flashing across my computer homepage the various headlines targeting us boomers: “The top ten pitfalls of retirement” or “Where should you live when you retire?”  I am too late for much of the preparatory advice, perhaps…but what can I do with what I have and where I am now?

The answers are actually abundant to the point where it can be confusing. Several options lay before me and many of my friends for every area of life. Finance, relationship and household decisions still give us pause; life’s biggies may still need settling. Should we move to a less expensive area – or country? Money goes much farther in South America, I hear.

Should we marry – or is it financially wiser to maintain two households in the relationship? Balancing the negatives and positives of retiree marriages is a tough one sometimes.

One of my close friends is dealing now with several of those big stressors: divorce, retirement, new relationship, home sale and moving, broken limb…you name it! It’s exciting, but scary, too.

You know those top ten stressful challenges of life – they may be even more challenging into our later years. Is there remedy? You bet! Good friends, lovers, music, food and wine can help, trust me.

Oh, and did I mention…grandchildren?! Don’t worry, I won’t get out my pictures to show you, but suffice it to say my little one-year-old grandson has sparked more love into my aging life! His cheery, dimpled face brightens my day when we Skype; listening to his first, “Bye, Gram-ma!” helped diminish sadness as I ended a recent visit. The future has taken on a whole new perspective.

Thankfully, the wonderful man in my life, together with all my dear family and friends will keep me thinking positively as I move forward into the last chapters of life. My hope is that everyone I know might be as lucky.

Pondering the Future of Earth

(originally published in the Ukiah Daily Journal May 24, 2015)

Despite my retirement from teaching last June, I’ve continually realized how much is still to be learned – and taught in life. One of my favorite activities is what I call “mind meandering” here on this small earthen ball spinning in airless, chunky soup which we call space. Ahhh, here we go a-meandering…

Space, the last frontier – a nod to my fellow Star Trek fans – is a huge something to ponder with our little minds. All of those existential questions usually come to the surface: How did we get here? Where is here? Why am I here? Etc, etc…

Believe me, I have no answers, just theories – which is all anyone could really have, since we’ve not been able to view our universe from another vista point or read a book written by a space traveler (sorry, Douglas Adams’s Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy  doesn’t count as a reference book on this subject).

Although noteworthy earth and sky students Copernicus and Galileo studied and questioned our universe five hundred years ago, it has taken many more scientists and their proven theories since then to bring us to our modern understanding. The caveat is that a few more hundred years from now, humans will look back and again realize how much is yet to learn.

As I substituted for a middle school class teacher last week, I was impressed by the passion of a young student in the class, Jade. Hopefully, we all were made aware of how much we humans must continually learn during the lesson. We watched a video on Galileo, a practicing Catholic and amazing stargazer who chose to believe the facts of his heavenly studies which clashed with Church doctrine at the time, unfortunately transforming the Church into his nemesis.

Galileo claimed, “I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with senses, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.” A good philosophy even today.

Since humans have only been on this planet for a relatively short time, neither the medieval nor modern age has dealt with cataclysmic changes. It seems our planet has spun for millions of years between those earth-changing events. Yet, from many pulpits as well as scientific platforms, various authorities pontificate on the possible modes of destruction for which we are bound as a planet. But when? Some may say next month; others may predict major earth disasters a few millennia from now. Who knows?!

The big questions we’re asking today is HOW will we do ourselves in – will it be Fire or Ice that makes life on earth impossible? (poet Robert Frost has a comment on that.) And, what can we do to keep it from ending badly? Hmmmm.

Multiple storytellers have too many possible scenarios to count. And, scientists cannot come to a consensus on this point, either. It is one of the big mysteries - - and I hope we’re wasting our time and imagination, to be honest.

Post-apocalyptic movies have been around since the 1930’s, starting with Deluge and Things to Come – what? Never seen them?! Maybe you’d like more recent films like Mad Max – Fury Road (2015) where you’ll hear, “My name is Max. My world is reduced to a single instinct: Survive.” OK.

Or there’s a more plausible television series, Revolution, where a universal power blackout makes surviving too difficult for most who are dependent on electricity and internet; despite being violent and back-to-basics, it imagines that some of us would be on a “journey of hope” and a rebirth of sorts. Check it out on Netflix – only two seasons, 2013 and 2014.

I would like to think that we can continue to adapt and create ways to manage what’s happening to us and our home planet. It’s what we’ve been doing as a species since we came into existence.

In recent history, modern humans moved from problem areas like the Dust Bowl after long droughts or rebuilt populations and cities after Black Deaths and World Wars.

Some interesting studies mentioned in a Time.com article explore the idea that many of our human physical changes are due to not only genetics, but also to our cultures. The National Academy of Sciences posed that cultural factors tend to have much more prominent impact than natural selection in the shaping of future generations. So, everything from what we eat for lunch and the number of our offspring could affect the future of our species - as well as a lack of rainfall and ozone changes!

Should we make changes in our behaviors to do less damage to the future of young Jade and her descendants? Of course, but will that be enough? And, if it’s not, can we load up and move to a healthier planet somewhere in the heavens? Maybe. Who’s to say that will not be possible in another millennium?! Look at all the changes in us and our home since modern homo sapiens evolved about 100,000 years ago.